Layoffs, inflation, a chaotic administration—it can feel harder than ever to stay calm in the midst of the storm.

There are many ways to stay grounded. One of the most successful, science-backed approaches is gratitude. When things are going great, it’s easy to feel grateful. But let’s face it—life is full of days (and years) that fall far short of “great.” So do we give up on gratitude? Or, paradoxically, is that when we need it most?

I recently read a list of common regrets of the dying. “I wish I had worked less,” was a popular one, along with, “I wish I’d had the courage to be my true self.” But this one stopped me in my tracks: “I wish I had let myself be happier.”

I was struck by that word, “let.” Is happiness something there for us to fall into, if only we’d let ourselves?

Happiness is not gratitude, but I believe they’re connected. If happiness is feeling good about what happens, then gratitude is feeling good about what is. Because so much of what is feels constant and not something that “happens” to us, it can be easy to lose sight of the long-lasting people and experiences that make life meaningful.

When what “happens” starts to feel chaotic or unsettling, taking refuge in “what is” can provide a bulwark against a sea of troubles.

Have you ever tried to force yourself to be happy? Personally, I wouldn’t recommend it. But I do think we have some measure of control over how we feel. We can’t make ourselves feel happy, but by inviting gratitude into our lives, we can create a space for contentment to take root and grow.

If finding reasons to be grateful is difficult for you, start small. Right now, I’m sitting on a blue sofa writing this article. If I was practicing gratitude right now, I could say that I’m grateful to have a sofa, and I’m grateful I got it in this shade of dusty blue that I really like. I’m grateful I can sit without pain. I’m grateful I am here.

You can be grateful for seasons changing, for the smell of fresh air, for your dog or cat, for a new water bottle—whatever comes to mind.

While taking the time to be grateful alone can be meaningful, gratitude is especially powerful in groups. Emotions are contagious, and experiencing gratitude in a group can be transformative.

At work, gratitude can help improve morale and reduce stress. But gratitude practices in the workplace need to be introduced carefully: it’s very likely that some of the stress and upset employees are feeling are a result of things happening at work.

If you want to begin offering gratitude as a wellness practice for employees, there’s a few things you should consider:

• Find a format. There are lots of ways to practice gratitude. In groups, it’s helpful to have a mix of personal silent reflection coupled with an opportunity to share. It’s important that people don’t feel forced to share if they don’t want to. If you’re leading the session, offer attendees a prompt to get them started. Consider having people write down what they’re grateful for— writing can make it feel more “real.” Below are some of my favorite prompts:
  • Think of a person you’re grateful for in your life. How have they impacted your life in a positive way?
  • What’s something that happened this week that you’re grateful for?
  • What’s something you have (or are) today that previously felt impossible to attain or achieve?
  • What’s the last beautiful thing you saw? What made it stand out to you?
• Read the room. Did your company just conduct a reduction-in-force? Did they just announce that they won’t be giving out bonuses this year? These are things that could cause employees to feel scared, upset, and anxious. If you decide to hold a gratitude practice after something happened or was announced that could negatively impact employees, start by acknowledging what happened. Explain why finding ways to feel gratitude is important, despite the obvious reasons people might not be feeling happy in the moment. Remember: to many employees, you represent the company. Attempts to gloss over negative events or remain unswervingly positive will likely come across as inauthentic or tone deaf.

• Model behavior. If you’re leading a gratitude session, be ready to share at least one thing you’re grateful for to get the ball rolling. If your session was a success, encourage managers to infuse gratitude into their management practice. Managers could begin weekly check-ins with a brief gratitude session, asking each person to reflect on one thing they’re grateful for and sharing one “gratitude” of their own. Not only does this give everyone a chance to think about the positive aspects of their lives, it’s a great way for managers to get to know their direct reports and vice-versa.

Life isn’t perfect, and it never will be. Nevertheless, we deserve to experience joy during our stay on this magnificent planet. Embracing gratitude literally changes our minds, shifts our moods, and reminds us that even when the world outside is dark, beauty, joy, and gratitude are still ours to claim.

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